Wednesday, March 17, 2010

Figures...

I got a letter in the mail today to let me know that I was to report for jury duty starting on April 16th...figures..I am going to write a letter to them to try and be excused from this. I just don't feel like I am emotionally ready to even think about something like this. I'm just not sure I can make a good decision on someone else's future right now. I guess if they want to allow crying episodes just out of the middle of nowhere then maybe they won't excuse me. I had a few of those today for some reason. Mike asked what set it off, and I guess it could have been all of the sympathy cards or just getting the jury duty letter...who knows. All I knwow is that today was another bad day. This week has been pretty good, and I feel pretty down today. I went to Monroeville to get my veins checked at the Circulatory Center down there. They basically wrote me a prescription for stockings immediately based on how my legs looked now..wow. They look really good right now compared to what they did look like a couple of weeks ago! I am scheduled for an ultrasound of my legs on the 24th of May to see what the problem might be. If it is something that can easily be fixed and would be worthwhile to do before having more children then we will go with it if it is going to help in keeping my legs from not getting that bad the next time around if there is another time around..I of course had to tell the nurse my history..she was very sweet about it, and she handled it very well. I just hate having to talk about to people I don't know..in fact, I hate talking about it period. I should just be able to receive the congratulations that they initially offer and then have to follow up with an apology..I did tell the nurse about my three children though...

Today is just one of those days that my whole body feels numb and out of it..I feel like I have no energy or any life left in my body today. It is such a strange feeling to go from being so energized yesterday to practically lifeless today. I am just walking around in a fog just accomplishing what needs to be done in order to get through the day. I just wish that I could snap out of it and get back some of the happiness that I felt yesterday. I just hate that everyone around me seems so happy all of the time, and I feel like such a miserable person. People probably think I am just not that friendly which is usually the opposite. I am usually the happy person who is always trying to make other people happy...I will get back there again I suppose.

Parker has now joined Carley with a cold. Fun stuff. They are both in good moods despite being sick so I can't complain about that I guess. I just get tired of chasing Parker around with a tissue since he really doesn't like having his nose wiped. I just hope that they get better soon because they are heading to our camp this weekend with my parents. I don't want them to be cranky for them! It is not fun to take cranky kids anywhere. They have been able to play outside this week so that has helped to get them some extra Vitamin D! I am wishing I could have gotten more myself today..maybe tomorrow! I am just hoping that tomorrow is a better day...

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